John Singer Sargent and I

John Singer Sargent and I. I've been a fan of the Edwardian painter, Sargent, for a very long time.   As a teenager I loved his paintings in the National Portrait Gallery in London and bought a postcard of the portrait of Lady Agnew of Lochnaw which I studied intently when I was at art college and kept for decades. One of my favourite paintings in the world is his "Carnation, Lily, Lily, Rose" of 2 little girls at twighlight with lanterns in a garden, which I visit at the Tate Britain like an old friend every time I am back in London.  There is no other artist with whom I develop relationships with their paintings in the same way. After thinking about it for some years, this week I finally started a project to learn more directly from his paintings by making student copies.   Firstly I read all kinds of material about him, from historical articles to 'how to' artist blogs.  I read about his life story and his methods as an artist. I was very surprised to find out that I had some things in common with him.  He was born to American parents in Italy and grew up in Europe, studying in Paris and was multilingual, as am I.  He was also a very gifted musician, and after a particularly bad review considered giving up painting to be a musician.  In my early days as a painter I actually did stop painting to be a professional musician after a portrait commission went badly. My copy of Sargent's masterpiece I picked these 2 paintings, the self portrait for the skin tones and the expressive brushstrokes, and the portrait of Lady Agnew just because I've loved it for such a long time. Matching my colour mixing and brushstrokes to the originals was so much harder than I imagined.  My own painting habits kept reasserting themselves as a default and it felt like being constantly interrupted.  Comparing my own skill in comparison to this great master was very hard on the ego, seeing myself fall short over and over again. I could feel my brain having to work harder and in new ways, new neural pathways forming in my head and felt dazed and exhausted after each session. I am enjoying having these paintings in my house and feel a strong sense of accomplishment from this project.  I'm curious to see how this will affect my painting in the coming weeks and months.